There are several definitions of a working stay at home mom, but here is a definition from my perspective: a mother that works from within the home to gain income while caring for the children, husband, cooking and completing daily chores. Everyone’s reason for becoming a stay at home mom differs, I became a stay at home mom due to my husband’s job relocation. Being a stay at home mom was totally new to me and definitely an adjustment. I admit this was not an easy transition at the beginning but I have grown to love every minute of it. I was also fortunate enough to continue to bring in some revenue from my previous employer. I couldn’t imagine not having my own income, I had been working since the age of 15 yrs young. Having my own money was a must whether it was a little or a lot, either way my husband understood and loved the drive that I showed to help with everything being that he was paying for it all. I didn’t have to work at all but of course this is what I've grown accustom to and it gave me a since of peace being able to bring in some income as well. Now back to the little ones who keep me so busy every minute of the day. All the screams, the laughs, and the tantrums, I enjoy every minute. If I said I always felt this way I would be lying to myself, however I think having outlets, creating task and hobbies gave me a since of peace. As previously stated, my natural journey was therapeutic. Doing my hair or my daughter's hair was something I was passionate about and took me away from everything else going on around me. Learning how to balance my time, ignore things and understanding I won’t be able to do everything in the same day, it’s okay to leave those dishes and catch a nap guess what, they’ll be there when you return from that nap. Stay at home moms will understand you must get some “me” time after running around with the kids, cooking, cleaning and working simultaneously.
Since I was immediately put in this position I wasn’t prepared, however working in a daycare during my younger days really helped me to adjust. I learned to come up with a schedule and tasks to complete each day. Structure is what keeps us stay at home moms going... I believe being a stay at home mom made me more OCD than ever. Even when my kids stayed off, I wanted to make sure they followed the same home schedule to the point it became an anxiety. I still desired the break but worried they would return and need to be quarantine/reprogrammed to get back on schedule. I learn that staying at home with my kids was a joy, which I was able to devote all my time to them. Hearing my son read and count before the age of two was amazing, listening watching my daughter turn into a teacher too her little brother was amazing. I wouldn’t trade this for anything in the world. We learned to have fun and enjoy each other in the good times and the bad. Even though there were bad times the good times always outweighed them. Seeing my kids smile was confirmation for me that I was doing the right thing.
Here is what everyone has been asking me, how do I do, what I do, and be successful and productive at the same time… Planning a schedule was/is the key. Knowing what times you can squeeze in to work was important. Whether it meant waking up at the crack of dawn to get my hours in working, while making sure that I didn't neglect the task at hand during the day which is my kids, was extremely important to me. I didn’t want to work while the kids were awake; my times to work were before they woke up in the morning, during nap time and when they went to sleep at night. Honestly I was able to devote about five hours to working and three to four hours working on my dream ~Twistncoils~ ( my current and future expression(s)), my daily chores and of course spending time with my wonderful hubby. Besides the lord leading the way, my husband is the reason that I’ve been able to embark upon and experience this lifestyle. This was actually one of his goals, being able to take care of everything so that I could spend as much time with our kids as possible. God I love that man!! Spending time with my husband is very important. I truly believe in a successful marriage, you must have time for each other. All of my time was valuable whether it meant cleaning, reading to the kids or working while cooking, picture this, working on your laptop sitting right next to the stove cooking. I know you stay at home moms can relate, we have to get “it” in any way we can. I know you all would love to hear my daily schedule but maybe I will create a video on how a day in the Hughes’ house goes, explaining it wouldn’t do any justice. You all need to see my wonderful children and husband that keep me going, I do what I do for them!
The other million dollar question that I get asked is, would I rather be working than raising my kids, and the answer is “NO”! I would rather be right here. I wanted this lifestyle so much… I was saddened to find out that my son had actually stood up (on his feet) for his teachers in daycare and not me, I missed that moment and will never get it back. I missed out on a lot during the beginning stages of my kids lives because they were in daycare, I didn’t have to beg my husband to allow me to stay at home, this is something that he wanted anyway. He worked really hard to provide for us and to allow us to have the freedom that we had, however I will admit that in the beginning, I started thinking wait I don’t want this much free time, maybe part-time working would have been enough. But no, I went from being away from my kids nine hours a day to being with them 24/7… some moms would have lost their minds. I thank God for guidance and teaching me to embrace this, I take this as a luxury that I would never take for granted. I thank my husband for allowing me to take advantage of this opportunity which opened doors for many things in my life and this is just the beginning. I know Twistncoils is unstoppable… what God has for me is for me. I will continue to use my talents and craft for his glory, yes doing hair or whatever can always be a way to share your story on how good God is to you……remember He loves you!!!
Thanks for taking the time to read my story!! Love and Loyalty ~TnC~
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